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Super Sleuth 7: Alpha and Friends

"3....2...1....we're live!"

The jolly music of the Alpha and Friends opening titles rang throughout the cosy studio. The final jaunty bars finished, and the audience clapped in anticipation. Standing beside a violet velvet couch was Alpha Centauri, former ambassador of the Galactic Federation.

"Hello, and welcome to another edition of Alpha and Friends," she said. "Today's guests are very special. They are both problem solvers for your beautiful planet, and are both known associates of the Doctor, from BBC1's Doctor Who. Please give a big round of applause for our first guest, Dinosaur Who!"

The audience clapped again, and a door to the left of the stage opened. Behind it, one could see the legs of a tuxedoed dinosaur trying to squeeze through. Eventually the wall collapsed, and Dr Who appeared, his afro in a perm and comically short arms waving at the warm and welcoming crowd. He smiled his dazzling smile and approached Alpha Centauri.

"Dinosaur Who, everybody!!" cried Alpha and the audience clapped and stamped their feet in approval. Dr Who leaned down and shared a quick kiss with the host before sitting down on the comfy sofa.

"So, Dr Who. What's your latest project?" quizzed Alpha.

"Raaaaaarrrrr. Raaaaaaaaaar raaaaaaaaaaaar rarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr rraaaaaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrr raaaaaaaaarrrrarrrrrrrrrr," he replied.

Alpha nodded in understanding, but everyone else looked confused. Somebody had removed the translation device, now Dr Who was making as much sense as a drunk Zarbi reading the Scottish telephone directory. Not realising this, Alpha continued with the questions.

"So, will you be living in South Africa for that job?"

"Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrarrrrr," roared Dr Who.

Realising what was happening, Sexy Voord (the second guest of the show) ran from backstage and alerted Alpha Centauri.

"Oh dear," shrieked Alpha. "It seems like there's been an act of sabotage."

But who would want to sabotage an episode of Alpha and Friends?


***


Our trio of heroes walked down a cobbled street, their shadows long in front of them. Behind, a giant fireball rose into the air. Awesome!

Thief of the translation device - watch out! They're coming for you!


***


In a lovely cathedral in the Vatican City, the Pope was crackling away. He had done it! He had stolen Dr Who's translation device. So clever. He giggled to himself. And there's no way they'll ever discover it was him...

***


"It was the Pope," declared Sexy Voord to her two comrades.


***


"Goddammit!" cursed the Pope, as he realised that he had been discovered. There was nothing left to do other than give the device back to Dinosaur Who. It was arranged so that it would be done in a special ceremony in the Vatican City. The Pope was truly sorry, and Dr Who naturally forgave him.

"There's one thing I don't understand," said Dinosaur Who, now that everybody could hear him. "How did you know it was the Pope?"

Sexy Voord paused before answering. "I spoke to Alpha Centauri's make up artist before the show. She reported seeing the Pope sneaking about the studio."

"Well that's another case solved," said Alpha, and the trio and the Pope all started laughing and that's the end of this story.
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